10 Dumbest iPhone Apps Ever

by Meiera Stern Aug 12, 2009

1. Shake Your Booty by Visionaire Design ($.99) is so feeble it prompted the Wall Street Journal blogger Maureen Scarpelli to report on the blogosphere's reaction to it.  iPhone Buzz weighed in with, "Well if this app doesn't prove that the entire Apple app approval process is arbitrary and stupid, I'm not sure what does." And Heather Lytle tweeted, "Seriously? We really need an app for that?" Booty allows you to wiggle a cartoonish woman's butt with your finger and shake your phone to make her shake her booty. It's definitely up there with the stupidest apps, but really why this particular app should draw so much ire when there are hundreds of other lame or feeble apps seems a little unfair. See below for some other doozies.

2. Of all the fart apps in the iTunes store, and there are over 50, the most Neanderthal of the bunch may well be I Love 2 Fart by BarnacleJive Software (free). This app doesn't even warrant 2 stars from users and the quoted testamonials about the app in iTunes read, "I think i just pooped my pants!" and "This is the saddest piece of garbage in the entire app store."

3. Stealth Sound Grenade is a good case of an app that makes a stupid app-Sound Grenade-even stupider by disguising it under a multiplication table app, "so you don't get caught". When you double tap the screen that reads 12 x 1 it will generate "a really, really annoying, nauseating, and headache producing high pitched sound. Seriously if this app and Sound Grenade could make it through Apple's app approval what couldn't?

4. Some would argue that any app that makes you do something as stupid as throwing your iPhone in the air to see how long it stays up should be number 1 on our list. But Marigo Holdings, LLC deserves some credit for its app HangTime ($.99), for sheer chutzpah. Marigo is trying to sell people on the idea of competing with each other to throw their iPhones higher and ever higher while sharing their up times with others around the world.

I'd like to know how many users of this app bother to sheath their iPhones in the right cases before launching them up off the Empire State Building? Duh. Ka-ching. New iPhone.

5. Among the snotty apps like iNose, iSnot, and iSneeze the one that stands out for its sheer slime appeal and yes stupidity is FlickABooger by KYLO ($.99). Pick a booger from the Pick-n- flick sources and fling it at your friends. This app also allows you save your booger shots to the saved photos section on the iPhone so you can send them to your friends. It's surprising only that the company didn't misspell Flick in the title of the app.

6. As if the fart and snot apps weren't bad enough, there are a slew of apps that feature the noises of sick people. Yes, and we humans are apparently willing to pay for them so we can "pull a Ferris Bueller," or just gross each other out. The most comprehensive of these seems to be 75+ Gross Sounds by ACME Mobile Products.

7. But really, the name of Barf Puke-a-thon says it all (Lima Sky $.99). 

8. Pick up lines seem to be as popular as farts judging by the sheer number of apps devoted to helping men score women. That anyone would be lonely and gullible enough to take these seriously isn't stupid, it's something else. However, Hillbilly PickUp is so stupid it's brilliant. Just put the phone in front of your mouth and let Hillbilly Zeke do all the talkin'. (Noon Studios $.99)

9. Vibrating Duck by BnM (free) features a vibrating rubber duck. Frankly, the only thing that could make this app any more stupid would be if BnM had the gall to charge people.

10. This last app would be a useful editorial for the above 9 apps, but come on! A Stupid Button by Scott Falbo ($.99)  is a red circle on a yellow background with Stupid written in white Cooper Black font. You can choose a female or male voice to say "That's Stupid." And natch, I agree.


  • 0. Stocks

    ediediedi had this to say on Aug 13, 2009 Posts: 6
  • Barf Puke-a-thon?! I certainly agree that this application sucks.What is the reason for this application. Just a plain waste of time and money. - Mario Romano

    Alan Shortall had this to say on Sep 10, 2011 Posts: 35
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